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After a huge fucking long unwanted LJ absence, I come back with UNBELIEVABLY GREAT NEWS

I get to see my boyfriend this Friday!!! :D
Hard to believe, after nearly 8 months of loneliness, now we can be together for a few blissful hours!!
:D :D :D
So damn happy that even my bipolar induced spring depression can't get to me.

I love you, penguin!!


Quick, tell the truth about something!
I don't cum as much as I tell you I do....i'm sorry.


so i discovered PostSecret.

and oMgeezies, i want to write page after page of all my secrets and get them out.
it's like every secret i have is another drop of black evil sludge in my heart and it's making it sick- and every time i write out a secret it drains a little. relieving, you know?

tomorrow i'm supposed to go meet a friend in the Big City..if the weather holds that is!

FucK i'm hungry! 3 cheeze quesadillas for brekki, with a cup of tea, and some massive catching up on my French homework. So like 400some cals, and it's only middady...

thinking about getting a curling iron and trying out the lolita style. also looking into some bleaching right at the crown of my head, so i'd have like a ring of fire and then all my masses of black waves.

PostSecret's taken over my head, can't think of anything but writing him now!

Fuck, I'm hungry...

So today I'm finally getting well. Crashed for about 10 hours in a blissfully dreamless sleep, woke up missing my other half so unbelievably bad but the sun was out and the sky was blue and pretty on the snow, so today's bearable.
This is the 2nd Valentine's I've had with my other half now, and also the second we've been away from each other- but Valentine's 2013 is the LAST ONE we'll have to spend away!!
I want to be thinner for him.
He says he'll love me no matter what, no matter what I look like, but I still want to be thin enough so I'm not embarrassed when we're naked- I want to be able to wear just the stockings like he likes and not have to worry that they're accentuating my fat roll at the inside tops of my thighs. I want to be able to strip off and walk around naked like he can. When we had a weekend together I had to wear my nightshirt because I was self-conscious..
I hate my body. Hate my face, with it's fat and poly cheeks and hidden cheekbones..
my tiny mouth and fuzzy face..
and that's just the top of me.

So today I held back my diet to a couple cups of tea (I am sick, after all) and the best part of a raspberry Greek yogurt- I know they're really fatty but they taste SO GOOD omg..
Now I'm fighting this headache and writing my journal and thinking of how imma go outside and listen to some music...
Happy late Valentine's day, alll. I hope you had a good one.

Hey There

Welp, here's my LiveJournal! I don't know if there's much point to this, as I don't have any friends, but maybe it'll give someone something to look at when I do friend someone. Hopefully it'll confirm that I'm not a total creeper, not deny it.
I write Deamus (Dean Thomas\Seamus Finnigan) fanfic for Harry Potter, under the psed kissmeimirish. I once wrote some horrible Star Trek (Original Series) fanfic under the pseud Spockoid31. I think those are still on fanfic.net :p I'm darkening the internet..
I am rather young, I suppose, but still like to listen and talk to people of any age. I'm really much sillier then this serious-sounding post sounds like :p I love to joke around.
I have no clue what my sexual orientation is, but it's not straight. I live literally in the middle of nowhere and write this once a week at the traveling library. I can't wait to be old enough to move out (not long now!) and go to college. Oh, I'm also a giant geek.
Point is, write to me, I'll listen, talk to me, I'll answer. Nothing is too outrageous to ask.
I played with Playmobils as a kid and music is my life. I have a cat and I'm not afraid to use this tired old catchphrase about her.
Senti  (Echo Alone)

Writer's Block: Vision Test

Do you believe in love at first sight?
Yes, very much so. Following it may or may not be good, but it can certainly happen.